At some point all new mothers have contemplated on this issue - we've fought tears, argued with ourselves and ultimately swayed one way or the other or perhaps a mixture of the two. Truth be told, it is hard. It is so hard - so difficult - to breast feed your child that I really hold all mothers who do it in high regard (myself included).
Image courtesy: Time
Men (or women who haven't yet experienced it) must wonder what is so difficult about breast feeding your baby. Its your child so we wonder it must come naturally, shouldn't it? As a new mother, I should want to hold my child close and feed her. So why is there such a big deal about it? For several reasons.
Firstly, as a new mother not only are you exhausted to the point of no return but also nervous because it is no longer about you. It was not a simple operation you just went through where life, as you know it, comes back to you. This time, your procedure has yielded you a tiny life dependent on you for her every move. She needs you to look after everything she does and as a first - time mother half the time you don't know what the hell you're doing.
Secondly, your own hormones are raging out of control. I don't know if its things falling back into place or new things erupting or something else science has yet to learn but you're on the edge, every minute of every day. A slight comment or a slight remark has the potential to send you flying (usually on your spouse; poor fellow who himself is suffering from lack of sleep).
These two reasons might still be easy to come around to but the last and perhaps the most important reason (for me) is how hard breast feeding is. First I need to make sure she sucks, then I need to make sure she latches on right and then I need to deal with the total agony of chapped, bruised and bleeding nipples. I know most men don't want to hear this but if we are about to judge a mother for giving her child the bottle and not even trying, we need to at least know the real reasons why.
Despite all this, many mothers keep going. I know some mothers who despite their child's inability to latch on have continued to pump and feed their baby. I really admire them (pumping is whole another issue). Why do we do it? Because we know it is important - important for the well being of the child and her overall growth. Science tells us that breast fed babies score an average of 5.2 points higher on IQ tests, are 40% less likely to develop diabetes, allergies, asthma and have better immune systems.
So why am I suddenly going on and on about this? Because of this. Apparently, Mayor Bloomberg has banned free formula milk in hospitals, making it more difficult for mothers to access it with the idea that it will promote breast feeding. I guess the clear answer is yes, it will promote more mothers to try who for one reason or another give up. There are instances of mothers who give up because they think they are not producing enough to fulfill their child's needs in the first few days. This is not accurate, your child's needs in the first few days of her birth equate the size of a marble (regardless of her physical size), steadily growing to a ping pong ball and so on. 9 out of 10 times, this enables a mother to catch up and meet their food needs sufficiently.
The other side of the argument claims it will stigmatize mothers who for one reason or another don't want to breast feed their baby. To them, I have nothing to say. As a mother of a four month old, still breast feeding her daughter, I say you at least owe it to yourself and, more importantly, your baby to try. It is agonizing and it will bring you pain but in the end it is worth it. As President Kennedy once said we don't do these things because they are easy but because they are hard. How long you do it is your decision but if we bring a little life into this world, we should at least try to do the best for them. The outcome, however, may not always be up to us.
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